Thai Bits and Pieces

The sun’s rays exploited a gap in the curtains and proceeded to warm the cool air lingering from the night. Unlike mornings at home where work beckons us to make a daily return, here we were greeting with fresh fruits and yogurt, and freshly baked breads and warm tea. Today however was different, for this was our final morning. We lingered in our room enjoying the tranquility of the morning listening to the distant sounds of the city beyond the walls of our guest house. Precisely on cue, the maid arrived at the doorstep, sweeping the prior day’s droppings of dried leaves from the garden patio. We were in no hurry to leave, and serendipitously were not scheduled to do so until the afternoon.

At breakfast we learned that another guest was waiting for our room, and the maid was on call to prepare it after our exit. Not wanting to keep everyone waiting, we quickly transferred our things into an adjoining room and then began the wearisome and monumental task of packing for our return flight.

As the afternoon approached, we found ourselves seated in the lounge with bags bulging near our feet, reflecting on our now expired month in this ancient civilization. Still without many of the modern luxuries of our relatively new culture in the States, this land has survived and even thrived with a richness uniquely its own. We discussed some of the many differences - some drastic and some minor - that made this land exciting and fresh.

We found that driving was not the only thing they did backwards from us - the contents of salt and pepper shakers seemed to be reversed. The small or single holes put out the salt and the larger or multiple holes put out the pepper. Oops. Better like both, 'cause there ain't no turning back once it’s on the food. We quickly learned to test first, shake later.

Speaking of driving, it was tricky adjusting to the flow of traffic. Something as customary as walking down the road had to be altered here. It’s not that moving to the other side of the road is hard, but we found that staying there is sometimes a problem. We had several close calls on our bicycles when we accidentally and unconsciously reverted to our American traffic system programming, especially when turning corners. Fortunately most Thai drivers are well accustomed to sharing the road with motorbikes, bicycles, people on foot and various animals including dogs and chickens, and they seem to be most accommodating and forgiving. We never saw even a hint of road rage.

In the populous parts of Thailand, it is a constant sight to see an unbelievable number of electric wires strung from pole to pole. In fact, the tops of poles are often completely buried in wires. We were also amazed to see workers on scaffolding and ladders made from bamboo. We even saw line workers with their bamboo ladders supported by the very lines they were fixing. Talk about getting your wires crossed.

As hair will grow, and ours did, the host at our Guest House recommended a nearby barber. Our diligent hair technician spoke no English so our instructions on how much to trim were met with smiles and nods. It seems that a smile really IS the international way to say "have no idea what you say but okay". We never expected what all was included in that $2 service. Eyebrows too long? Clip clip. Nose hair sticking out? Clip clip clip. Ear hair sticking out? Clip! At the sink we received the Thai Massage version of shampooing. We imagined her thoughts: “Lather, scrub, squeeze, pull, push and rub all hair from client head, rinse and repeat. Make sure push on head bumps. No head bumps? Make some.”

Thai people seem to have an almost magical way of dealing with trash for we rarely saw trash cans in public places, yet litter was equally as rare. In Bangkok it is actually illegal to litter. We were constantly hunting for trash cans and were frequently left holding the bag, or cup, or wrapper…

Thais must also be very clean eaters. IF we had napkins at restaurants they were hardly bigger than a movie ticket, barely big enough to wipe half a lip. Some napkins in American restaurants (can you say buffet?) can unfold to the size of a newspaper. Small trash bins sat beneath most tables so at least we knew where to put our micro-napkins when we were through.

Most restaurants provided chopsticks, and occasionally there were places where no other kinds of eating utensils were visible. Thai servers also took some getting used to, and at first it seemed we were being ignored. We found out that once they bring your meal you are on your own. They don’t even bring the check until they are signaled to return.

Working through our travel to-do list, we decided to see a movie in Thailand. We found a theater that had films showing in English so we took a bicycle trek to a cinema complex in a gigantic mall. There was more parking designated for motorcycles than cars, and the lots were full and overflowing. As we neared the entrance to the parking area, a large snake was crossing the road. It was well over three feet long; nice, brown and cobra-esque. No one seemed to pay any attention to it, besides us. Perhaps the locals are accustomed to the critters, but it gave us quite a start.

Entering the five level mall felt like walking into any huge mall in the United States. The main difference was the prevalence of Thai language on signs and placards; however the idea of a SALE transcends the language barrier. The theater was on the topmost level and as modern as any in the world. Purchasing tickets was automated and required seat selection. For an additional charge you could get a seat in the "Honeymoon Section", which encompassed the last couple of rows in the back of the theater.

Being popcorn enthusiasts we had to order some for the show. I ordered the jumbo, the largest size they offer, and was handed a small bag. I tried to exchange it hoping the clerk would understand that I wanted the extra-large, not a small or medium. The guy had to call over help before we both understood, that WAS the large! Yikes! We knew the Thai people were small, but even their popcorn matches? I ordered a second bag.

Before the movie started, as is customary in all theaters in Thailand, the Thai national anthem played and all stood in reverence to the king. Even though we had already experienced a few of these national patriotic pauses, they never ceased to impress.
The movie we saw was a new American release, and we actually got to see it almost a full week before the American premier. Too bad we had to leave the country ONE DAY before the early release of the new 3D Star Wars Episode One. Guess we'll have to wait and see it in the US with all the other poor saps who didn’t get in on it early. As we were leaving the theater we noticed the floor of the grand entry area was lined with golden stars and names of screen actors. One that immediately stood out was Gwyneth Pattrow (instead of Paltrow). Poor Gwyneth. immortalized erroneously in Thailand.

Exiting the theater back into the mall we found the entire place closed up for the night. The escalators had stopped, all the primary lighting was out and the place deserted, with the exception of the movie goers. It was an eerie feeling and we wondered if we were supposed to be there. We followed some other stragglers back to the parking area, and on our bicycles made one last cross city trek back to the guest house.